Some days are like this, yes? You wake up determined to feel sorry for yourself and all the hard things you need to do. You see the “to-do list” and even as you are scratching one item off, three more get added. The workload of a stay at home, homeschooling mom is daunting. Add to that the burden of those who work from home as well and you have a potential recipe for a pity party. Here is how I have determined to teach my brain (and my heart and my soul) to reconsider this day and the tasks it holds in a way that will leave me rejoicing, rather than pulling the covers over my head in surrender.
Please read the rest of my latest Heart of the Matter Online Article http://heartofthematteronline.com/2011/06/how-i-got-over-myself/
Showing posts with label prayer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label prayer. Show all posts
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Wow-ful Women Wednesday
Okay. Really? All these people? On one stage? Together? At the same time? Singing? Worshipping? At the same time? Seriously.
My kids are saying that I shouldn't really post this video on Wow-ful Women Wednesday because there is only one woman. And really it isn't about that for me anyway today. This video is being used by the Lord to teach me a lesson today. There has been a very specific theme in what I'm hearing and reading and discussing these days, and this video represents a whole lot of what I need to learn.
Thanks to my friend, Wendy, for posting this video this week. I certainly wouldn't have found it otherwise.
My kids are saying that I shouldn't really post this video on Wow-ful Women Wednesday because there is only one woman. And really it isn't about that for me anyway today. This video is being used by the Lord to teach me a lesson today. There has been a very specific theme in what I'm hearing and reading and discussing these days, and this video represents a whole lot of what I need to learn.
Thanks to my friend, Wendy, for posting this video this week. I certainly wouldn't have found it otherwise.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Battling Depression Part Two
As time went by, and the darkness didn’t lift, I found myself in a place of desperation. My husband, shortly after the birth of our fourth daughter and approximately 9 months into my depression said to me, “Will I always have a wife who is depressed?” He said it not in an accusing way, nor in a frustrated way: he seemed to be simply trying to prepare himself for what the rest of our lives (and therefore, his responsibilities) might look like. And in that moment I knew something needed to change. I didn’t know what, and I didn’t know how, but I knew, with newly found resolve, that I could not carry on like this for the sake of my husband and children. My husband was (and still is) a very hands-on dad, but he did have a full time job and it was unreasonable for me to expect him to pick up all my pieces too. But where to start? I continued going through the motions of parenting and daily life, and I continued willing myself to get better. I’m sure you can imagine the level of success that brought.
The turning point for me was in June of 2002. During the quiet prayer time at our church’s ladies’ retreat, I read a verse that I am sure I had never noticed in my bible before that day.
Please read Part Two of my Heart of the Matter series here.
The turning point for me was in June of 2002. During the quiet prayer time at our church’s ladies’ retreat, I read a verse that I am sure I had never noticed in my bible before that day.
Please read Part Two of my Heart of the Matter series here.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Heart of the Matter Online
It is Heart of the Matter time again. Please follow this link to read my latest article, which is actually part one of a series of four.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Compassion Bloggers
Our family has a child that we sponsor through Compassion. His name is Juan and he lives in Colombia. It is truly amazing how connected one can feel to a child they will likely never meet just by reading their letters and looking at their pictures.
Juan was in a very serious accident a few years ago, and we have prayed with him and his family as we wait for his recovery. It is a long slow process, especially considering the limitations of finances and access to medical care that Juan's family has.
We praise the Lord for the Compassion Project and the local church that are coming alongside Juan's family to help support them and care for them in very practical ways. We rejoice when Juan says that he loves Jesus and knows that God can heal him, if He chooses. We are so grateful to be even a small part of his life. And we know that we often get too busy and get behind in our letter writing, wondering what difference a note from us might make.
Well, if I ever had any doubt about the difference a sponsor makes in these kids' lives, along comes this video. If you aren't already a subscriber to Shaun Groves' blog, you really should be. If nothing else, seeing his blog will remind you to write to your child. And if you haven't sponsored a child yet, maybe this will be the nudge you need to do it. What a difference a prayer makes. I love this story.
God is so good!
Please follow this link to see this testimony from the family of the girl that Shaun Groves' sponsors.
And then follow this link to learn more about how you can make a difference in a child's life.
Juan was in a very serious accident a few years ago, and we have prayed with him and his family as we wait for his recovery. It is a long slow process, especially considering the limitations of finances and access to medical care that Juan's family has.
We praise the Lord for the Compassion Project and the local church that are coming alongside Juan's family to help support them and care for them in very practical ways. We rejoice when Juan says that he loves Jesus and knows that God can heal him, if He chooses. We are so grateful to be even a small part of his life. And we know that we often get too busy and get behind in our letter writing, wondering what difference a note from us might make.
Well, if I ever had any doubt about the difference a sponsor makes in these kids' lives, along comes this video. If you aren't already a subscriber to Shaun Groves' blog, you really should be. If nothing else, seeing his blog will remind you to write to your child. And if you haven't sponsored a child yet, maybe this will be the nudge you need to do it. What a difference a prayer makes. I love this story.
God is so good!
Please follow this link to see this testimony from the family of the girl that Shaun Groves' sponsors.
And then follow this link to learn more about how you can make a difference in a child's life.
Monday, November 29, 2010
What's in a Name?
If you are anything like me, which I'm sure you are, there are times when you just haven't got a foggy clue what you are doing, and you are pretty sure that no one has ever felt as lost as you, and that no one could ever possibly get the disaster your brain is in. Can I get an "amen"? Anyone? Thank you.
I remember one such time. It was way back in the days of "the Townhouse" which is code for "the days when, yes we were living in the townhouse, but more than that it was in the time of life when we had 4 kids under the age of 4, and I was embroiled in my biggest life battle to date".
Someone had directed me to a blog and forum for moms where I went to find someone who understood me. Someone who'd been there. I tried to submit two questions about my state of confusion and exhaustion on the forum. The first they refused to post as it "encouraged something the moderators didn't endorse". So the second question, I made sure to be broad and unoffensive and something that would stir some helpful conversation.
What I said was something like this: "I'm a very young mom. I stay at home with my kids all the time. I love it and wouldn't have it any other way, but I'm really tired. And sometimes pretty sad. Can anyone relate?" What I received back was a bunch of platitudes and "right answers".
"No, I love it! I'm so blessed to be at home and I never feel tired or grumpy at all!"
"No, the joy of the Lord is *my* strength. I sure never feel sad at home at all!"
"Who could ever feel lonely when Jesus is your present help and comfort?"
And you know what? I knew all that. I knew that was supposed to be my reality, but the reality was that I was still tired: physically, emotionally, spiritually tired. My spiritual life was not stagnant. I was not being disobedient, or ungrateful, or rebellious. I had a wonderful husband with a fabulous marriage, and a supportive church. My little children were good sleepers and fairly obedient, all things considered. Life wasn't bad. I wasn't complaining. I was just a busy, tired woman. And no one understood. Or so I thought. They weren't hearing me. They weren't getting me. They couldn't help me.
One day in my quiet time I sat down hoping to hear a word of encouragement in my daily reading. I felt a strange prompting to read 1 Chronicles 3:8. Really? Really.
I kind of ignored it, but it wouldn't go away, so I finally turned to that spot thinking I was probably imagining things. Sure enough, the verse says this: "Elishama, Eliada, and Eliphelet". Nope. Not a word from the Lord. Just a list of names.
I tried to move on, back to my scheduled reading for the day, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was to read that passage again. So I did, and the whole chapter looking for something in the context. Nothing. It is just a list of the descendants of David. I was hoping that those 3 names were not the ordained names for my next 3 children!
Still, I felt like I was supposed to "get" something out of that verse. Finally, I thought to look up in a bible dictionary what those names meant.
Here's what those names mean, and what the Lord wanted me to know that day: "The Lord hears, The Lord knows, and The Lord will deliver."
He understood me. He heard my prayers. He knew my heart. And, as my present help in times of trouble, he would deliver me in his time and in his way.
How grateful I was that day for 3 funny sounding names. And how grateful I am still that we have a Lord who sympathizes with our weakness, and who understands our frailty, and who can speak to any specific circumstance in our day through the Word.
What does the Lord mean to speak to you today? What burden do you need Him to carry for you? He is more than able. And more than willing. And that is a very, very good thing.
I remember one such time. It was way back in the days of "the Townhouse" which is code for "the days when, yes we were living in the townhouse, but more than that it was in the time of life when we had 4 kids under the age of 4, and I was embroiled in my biggest life battle to date".
Someone had directed me to a blog and forum for moms where I went to find someone who understood me. Someone who'd been there. I tried to submit two questions about my state of confusion and exhaustion on the forum. The first they refused to post as it "encouraged something the moderators didn't endorse". So the second question, I made sure to be broad and unoffensive and something that would stir some helpful conversation.
What I said was something like this: "I'm a very young mom. I stay at home with my kids all the time. I love it and wouldn't have it any other way, but I'm really tired. And sometimes pretty sad. Can anyone relate?" What I received back was a bunch of platitudes and "right answers".
"No, I love it! I'm so blessed to be at home and I never feel tired or grumpy at all!"
"No, the joy of the Lord is *my* strength. I sure never feel sad at home at all!"
"Who could ever feel lonely when Jesus is your present help and comfort?"
And you know what? I knew all that. I knew that was supposed to be my reality, but the reality was that I was still tired: physically, emotionally, spiritually tired. My spiritual life was not stagnant. I was not being disobedient, or ungrateful, or rebellious. I had a wonderful husband with a fabulous marriage, and a supportive church. My little children were good sleepers and fairly obedient, all things considered. Life wasn't bad. I wasn't complaining. I was just a busy, tired woman. And no one understood. Or so I thought. They weren't hearing me. They weren't getting me. They couldn't help me.
One day in my quiet time I sat down hoping to hear a word of encouragement in my daily reading. I felt a strange prompting to read 1 Chronicles 3:8. Really? Really.
I kind of ignored it, but it wouldn't go away, so I finally turned to that spot thinking I was probably imagining things. Sure enough, the verse says this: "Elishama, Eliada, and Eliphelet". Nope. Not a word from the Lord. Just a list of names.
I tried to move on, back to my scheduled reading for the day, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was to read that passage again. So I did, and the whole chapter looking for something in the context. Nothing. It is just a list of the descendants of David. I was hoping that those 3 names were not the ordained names for my next 3 children!
Still, I felt like I was supposed to "get" something out of that verse. Finally, I thought to look up in a bible dictionary what those names meant.
Here's what those names mean, and what the Lord wanted me to know that day: "The Lord hears, The Lord knows, and The Lord will deliver."
He understood me. He heard my prayers. He knew my heart. And, as my present help in times of trouble, he would deliver me in his time and in his way.
How grateful I was that day for 3 funny sounding names. And how grateful I am still that we have a Lord who sympathizes with our weakness, and who understands our frailty, and who can speak to any specific circumstance in our day through the Word.
What does the Lord mean to speak to you today? What burden do you need Him to carry for you? He is more than able. And more than willing. And that is a very, very good thing.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
An Open Letter to Some of my Daughters
Dear precious, lovely girls:
I have a couple of things to say to you today. They've been on my heart for a while but have been more like "groans too deep for words" that only the Spirit can interpret until now. Finally I feel like maybe, just maybe, I know what some of these words on the tip of my tongue are, and how to get them out. Maybe.
First, let me say that of all our girls you are most like me. I know you know that. You hear it all the time from me, from the grandparents, from folks at church. Here's what you may not know: for years I've been praying that you would be nothing like me at all.
I know that sounds backwards. Most moms love to hear that their daughters take after them. "Oh, she has your eyes", we love to hear. But some of the ways you are like me are things about myself that I have prayed against and struggled with for years.
I have prayed earnestly that the Lord would make you take after your father more than after me. I've prayed that you would be spared the frustration I've worked through struggling over specific sin issues that linger decade after decade.
What I want is for you to have an easier time than I've had in certain areas of life. I want for you to not have to take so many thoughts captive in your head as these lies creep in, shaking your faith. I want for you to know that you know that you know that you are loved by Jesus. I want for you to experience less temptation, less fear, less guilt, less laziness, less pride. I want for you to be like Christ right now, not after a life-long, sometimes slow process of sanctification.
But here is what I have just realized:
If the Lord didn't bless you with weakness, you would never look to him for strength.
If the Lord didn't bless you with pain, you would never look to him for comfort.
If the Lord didn't bless you with sorrow, you would never look to him for joy.
If the Lord didn't bless you with guilt, you would never look to him for forgiveness.
If the Lord didn't bless you with sickness, you would never look to him for healing.
The things that I have hated about myself have thrown me to my knees in prayer, and have kept my eyes fixed on Christ. That is what I want for you. So if that means the Lord needs to make you like me in order to turn you to Christ, then so be it. I'll be on my knees beside you.
Praying for you daily,
Your Mom
I have a couple of things to say to you today. They've been on my heart for a while but have been more like "groans too deep for words" that only the Spirit can interpret until now. Finally I feel like maybe, just maybe, I know what some of these words on the tip of my tongue are, and how to get them out. Maybe.
First, let me say that of all our girls you are most like me. I know you know that. You hear it all the time from me, from the grandparents, from folks at church. Here's what you may not know: for years I've been praying that you would be nothing like me at all.
I know that sounds backwards. Most moms love to hear that their daughters take after them. "Oh, she has your eyes", we love to hear. But some of the ways you are like me are things about myself that I have prayed against and struggled with for years.
I have prayed earnestly that the Lord would make you take after your father more than after me. I've prayed that you would be spared the frustration I've worked through struggling over specific sin issues that linger decade after decade.
What I want is for you to have an easier time than I've had in certain areas of life. I want for you to not have to take so many thoughts captive in your head as these lies creep in, shaking your faith. I want for you to know that you know that you know that you are loved by Jesus. I want for you to experience less temptation, less fear, less guilt, less laziness, less pride. I want for you to be like Christ right now, not after a life-long, sometimes slow process of sanctification.
But here is what I have just realized:
If the Lord didn't bless you with weakness, you would never look to him for strength.
If the Lord didn't bless you with pain, you would never look to him for comfort.
If the Lord didn't bless you with sorrow, you would never look to him for joy.
If the Lord didn't bless you with guilt, you would never look to him for forgiveness.
If the Lord didn't bless you with sickness, you would never look to him for healing.
The things that I have hated about myself have thrown me to my knees in prayer, and have kept my eyes fixed on Christ. That is what I want for you. So if that means the Lord needs to make you like me in order to turn you to Christ, then so be it. I'll be on my knees beside you.
Praying for you daily,
Your Mom
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Wow-ful Women Wednesdays
Some days you are just in the middle of a real sunshiny day and all you can say is "God is so good". Some days you are just in the middle of a real dark, heavy cloud...what do you say then?
God is still good. God is always good. Even when it is hard to see or feel. It is just true. God is good, all the time.
This song is one of my all time favourites. (It is a good one to listen to with out watching the video so that you can picture yourself in the story she sings.)
I have a few people in mind specifically as I listen to this song today. And I'm praying that they would tangibly experience the presence of God today in the middle of their circumstances. Who can you pray this song for today?
God is still good. God is always good. Even when it is hard to see or feel. It is just true. God is good, all the time.
This song is one of my all time favourites. (It is a good one to listen to with out watching the video so that you can picture yourself in the story she sings.)
I have a few people in mind specifically as I listen to this song today. And I'm praying that they would tangibly experience the presence of God today in the middle of their circumstances. Who can you pray this song for today?
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Wow-ful Women Wednesdays
The statistics are bad. They say that Christian marriages are as likely to end in divorce as non-Christian marriages. That's not okay. It's not okay that non-Christian families are falling apart. It's not okay that our friends and family are being divided and shattered in this way.
I know of too many couples today who are struggling in their marriages, who want it to work out but can't see the way to restoration, who are looking to the Lord for healing but can't tear down the walls between them and their spouses.
Will you join me today in praying for marriages. Pray that those who are hurting will be humble and gracious enough to love their spouse despite their weaknesses. That they will have the "others-centeredness" to care for each other's needs above their own. That they will look to the inventor of marriage, the Lord himself, to the be the healer and restorer and rebuilder of their family.
And not only for those among us who we know are struggling: pray also for those who are doing well, that they would be even stronger in their faith and their unity, and that there wouldn't be even a crack in the bond that unites them.
Sometimes the wounds are deep, and deliberate, and unfathomably hard to forgive. But sometimes it just starts from a tone, and an offense, and an attitude that is left to fester. Let's nip those kinds of offenses in the bud and let love cover a multitude of sins. And let's pray pray pray for the health of the marriages in our midst. No matter how hard it is to work it out, this is a battle worth fighting.
It's Me -- Sara Groves
Well it came and caught us off our guard
we were just laughin' and feelin' alright
had such a great time just last night
we walked into a minefield undetected
you took a tone and I took offense
anger replacing all common sense
oh run for your life
all tenderness is gone
in the blink of an eye
all good will has withdrawn
and we mark out our paces and
stare out from our faces
but baby you and I are gone gone gone
incomprehensible layers of isolation
now you're the man with a heart of stone
making me pay here by being alone
seemingly justified righteous indignation
now I'm the woman who holds all her pain
looking for somebody else to blame
we hold all the keys to our undoing
cutting me down in small degrees
you know my worst insecurities
I'm making no effort to understand
no one can hurt you like I can
deep down inside the girl's waking up
she's calling out to the boy she loves
it's me
oh baby it's me
how in the world can tenderness be gone
in the blink of an eye
the girl in me she's callin out
oh the girl in me she's callin out
to the boy in you
to the boy in you
baby come back
baby come back to me
I know of too many couples today who are struggling in their marriages, who want it to work out but can't see the way to restoration, who are looking to the Lord for healing but can't tear down the walls between them and their spouses.
Will you join me today in praying for marriages. Pray that those who are hurting will be humble and gracious enough to love their spouse despite their weaknesses. That they will have the "others-centeredness" to care for each other's needs above their own. That they will look to the inventor of marriage, the Lord himself, to the be the healer and restorer and rebuilder of their family.
And not only for those among us who we know are struggling: pray also for those who are doing well, that they would be even stronger in their faith and their unity, and that there wouldn't be even a crack in the bond that unites them.
Sometimes the wounds are deep, and deliberate, and unfathomably hard to forgive. But sometimes it just starts from a tone, and an offense, and an attitude that is left to fester. Let's nip those kinds of offenses in the bud and let love cover a multitude of sins. And let's pray pray pray for the health of the marriages in our midst. No matter how hard it is to work it out, this is a battle worth fighting.
It's Me -- Sara Groves
Well it came and caught us off our guard
we were just laughin' and feelin' alright
had such a great time just last night
we walked into a minefield undetected
you took a tone and I took offense
anger replacing all common sense
oh run for your life
all tenderness is gone
in the blink of an eye
all good will has withdrawn
and we mark out our paces and
stare out from our faces
but baby you and I are gone gone gone
incomprehensible layers of isolation
now you're the man with a heart of stone
making me pay here by being alone
seemingly justified righteous indignation
now I'm the woman who holds all her pain
looking for somebody else to blame
we hold all the keys to our undoing
cutting me down in small degrees
you know my worst insecurities
I'm making no effort to understand
no one can hurt you like I can
deep down inside the girl's waking up
she's calling out to the boy she loves
it's me
oh baby it's me
how in the world can tenderness be gone
in the blink of an eye
the girl in me she's callin out
oh the girl in me she's callin out
to the boy in you
to the boy in you
baby come back
baby come back to me
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Focus, Focus, Focus
I don’t know about you, but there are moments in my day (and days in my week!) where I just feel frazzled, out of control, and clearly scatter-brained! (Can I get an amen?) What’s a gal to do to regain her focus? What’s a mom to do in order to help her kids regain their focus?
I read a brilliant book called Prayer: Finding the Heart’s True Home by Richard Foster. Actually I’ve read it several times now and each time I am drawn by his conversation on the simple complexity of prayer.
One of my favorite suggestions he makes is to select a “breath prayer” for yourself that you offer up many times a day. Something that is on your heart that can be said in one breath, so to speak. How often do I intend to pray “if only I had more time”. This gives me the ability to pray without ceasing on one matter that will greatly impact my day, and allow me to focus my heart and attentions. (Oh, I wish you would go and read the book. I’m making this sound an awful lot like a chore…he is much more inviting about this…)
Please read the rest of my article for Heart Of The Matter here.
I read a brilliant book called Prayer: Finding the Heart’s True Home by Richard Foster. Actually I’ve read it several times now and each time I am drawn by his conversation on the simple complexity of prayer.
One of my favorite suggestions he makes is to select a “breath prayer” for yourself that you offer up many times a day. Something that is on your heart that can be said in one breath, so to speak. How often do I intend to pray “if only I had more time”. This gives me the ability to pray without ceasing on one matter that will greatly impact my day, and allow me to focus my heart and attentions. (Oh, I wish you would go and read the book. I’m making this sound an awful lot like a chore…he is much more inviting about this…)
Please read the rest of my article for Heart Of The Matter here.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Thinking Back to the Most Beautiful Blizzard.
Today my baby turns two. It has made me flashback to the details of his birth and the lessons the Lord taught me at that time. I realize that reading birth stories is not everyone's cup of tea, so feel free to skip this link if you want to. Maybe reading someone's birth story would be highly unhelpful and hurtful to you today, and I don't mean to stir up any painful memories for anyone. However, Zachary's birth stirred up a lot of ugliness in my heart too, at the time, and I am grateful today for the reminder of what the Lord showed me through the details of Zach's arrival, and all that led up to it.
So if you are interested, please join me in reliving this day in history.
So if you are interested, please join me in reliving this day in history.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Wow-ful Women Wednesdays
Natalie Grant? Again? Oh yes. I really think this woman has the most stunning voice and such a range of styles of music she can pull off really convincingly, which says to me, that she really appreciates the complexities of many styles of music. That, to me, says a lot about a musician. Love it.
However, today's song choice is so much more about message. And truthfully, when I first heard this song on the radio, I understood the message much differently than is presented by the visuals in the video. So maybe listen once with eyes closed ad once with eyes open to see what story you would put to the words.
There are many folks in my life right now who are in very complicated places emotionally. These families and individuals are looking to the Lord for their strength and their hope in seemingly impossible situations. Heartbreak of every kind. And yet in it, they are saying, "Still, I believe God is good. I believe God is in control. I believe we'll get through this."
On the other hand, there are many folks in my life who are on the other side of it. They've come through the fire, shining like Silver, and saying, "See, God is good. God always was in control. He got us through it."
Whichever side of a trial you stand on today, here is the truth you need to hear: in God's hands, in the loving arms of Jesus, is the only rest and hope and strength that will not fail.
However, today's song choice is so much more about message. And truthfully, when I first heard this song on the radio, I understood the message much differently than is presented by the visuals in the video. So maybe listen once with eyes closed ad once with eyes open to see what story you would put to the words.
There are many folks in my life right now who are in very complicated places emotionally. These families and individuals are looking to the Lord for their strength and their hope in seemingly impossible situations. Heartbreak of every kind. And yet in it, they are saying, "Still, I believe God is good. I believe God is in control. I believe we'll get through this."
On the other hand, there are many folks in my life who are on the other side of it. They've come through the fire, shining like Silver, and saying, "See, God is good. God always was in control. He got us through it."
Whichever side of a trial you stand on today, here is the truth you need to hear: in God's hands, in the loving arms of Jesus, is the only rest and hope and strength that will not fail.
Monday, November 16, 2009
The Curse of Organization
How many times have you heard, or said, “A place for everything and everything in its place”? You know as well as I that this is a helpful adage. And getting it ingrained in your kids can certainly facilitate an easier clean-up time. Nothing worse than saying to your children “Please, go clean up the craft area” and then finding that everyone has merely shoved all the craft supplies in to the toy boxes and book shelves because there is no obvious spot for those items to be stored.
However, the problem comes when you get yourself so nicely organized, and you get a place for everything that you free up some shelf or drawer space. Heaven forbid you’d have an empty drawer! Heaven forbid there might be a shelf with nothing on it! Has this happened to you?
We recently moved to a house that had more kitchen cupboards than our previous home. I found that my kitchenware fit nicely into my kitchen with room to spare. Immediately, I found myself looking for more stuff to fill those drawers. Perhaps I ought to go buy some cases of baked beans and bulk spices to fill the pantry? Same situation in the bathroom. The previous owners had installed a lovely vanity with plenty of drawers. We don’t need all these drawers. I found myself wanting to race to the store to stock up on extra hygiene and personal care items just to fill the space. Just how many bottles of shampoo and conditioner does one need to have on hand at all times?
I changed the adage to read: “A thing for everyplace and everyplace full of things.”
Please read the rest of my latest article for Heart of the Matter Online here.
However, the problem comes when you get yourself so nicely organized, and you get a place for everything that you free up some shelf or drawer space. Heaven forbid you’d have an empty drawer! Heaven forbid there might be a shelf with nothing on it! Has this happened to you?
We recently moved to a house that had more kitchen cupboards than our previous home. I found that my kitchenware fit nicely into my kitchen with room to spare. Immediately, I found myself looking for more stuff to fill those drawers. Perhaps I ought to go buy some cases of baked beans and bulk spices to fill the pantry? Same situation in the bathroom. The previous owners had installed a lovely vanity with plenty of drawers. We don’t need all these drawers. I found myself wanting to race to the store to stock up on extra hygiene and personal care items just to fill the space. Just how many bottles of shampoo and conditioner does one need to have on hand at all times?
I changed the adage to read: “A thing for everyplace and everyplace full of things.”
Please read the rest of my latest article for Heart of the Matter Online here.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Confirmation
For the last several years if you asked me what the Lord was teaching me right now, I would have said "Death to self". Man, that is some lengthy lesson! Except just lately, I'm finding that the key to the lesson (as to most, I would wager) is submission. Submission to the will of God and resting in His plan rather than fighting for "my way". Because, seriously, I've seen how my way works. Not so good.
If you asked me to clarify what I was learning in that massive topic of death to self, I would say that I am learning to do only what the Lord is calling me to, and nothing else. This looks like me with my nose in my journal making lists of the roles I know for certain that I am called to fill, and then making lists with question marks beside for the roles I could fill, but maybe am not really required to fill. For example: I'm married, so I'm clearly supposed to be a wife. I have kids, therefore, I'm called to be a mom. And so on. But then it gets hazy. I sing at church. Does that mean for certain that I'm to be a worship leader? Or I write. Does that mean for certain that I'm to be a writer?
And then the complicating factor to all this is that I want to really serve the Lord. You know, the missionary comes to church and your heart is quickened by the crazy-faith they are asked to live out. Or that guy at church starts some wild outreach that terrifies, yet excites, you and all you want to do is find something "Big For God" to do. And truthfully, being a "writer" seems bigger and more impressive somedays than being "chief dish and bottle washer".
Yes, well, having 7 children and homeschooling them is a big job to be sure. And I have been convinced for some time that the Lord builds his Kingdom through families as much as through overseas missions, for example. There are many ways to build the Kingdom and I am honoured to serve Him in this way.
But sometimes that little "Look at me! I want to be important too!" attitude rears its ugly head and I question the value of the mundane tasks of my role. And the questioning doesn't squelch my doing the mundane, but certainly the enthusiasm with which I do it.
I want to be Peter walking on water! I want to be Stephen stoned for his faith (well, a little less of that, actually). Then I read this:
"Discipleship is built entirely on the supernatural grace of God. Walking on water is easy to someone with impulsive boldness, but walking on dry land as a disciple of Jesus Christ is something altogether different. Peter walked on water to go to Jesus, but he "followed Him at a distance" on dry land (Mark 14:54). We do not need the grace of God to withstand crises -- human nature and pride are sufficient for us to face the stress and strain magnificently. But it does require the supernatural grace of God to live twenty-four hours of every day as a saint, going through the drudgery, and living an ordinary, unnoticed, and ignored existence as a disciple of Jesus. It is ingrained in us that we have to do exceptional things for God -- but we do not. We have to be exceptional in the ordinary things of life, and holy on the ordinary streets, among ordinary people -- and this is not learned in five minutes." (Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest, October 21)
This is confirmation to me that it is the slow-plodding and small beginnings of being faithful in little before you are trusted with much that builds the Kingdom. And what do I want? A big one time blast of "super-holy-change-the-world" faith? Or a life time of faithful, useful, life-changing (mine and others) faith? Clearly the latter.
And so I continue, changing diapers, making meals, inviting folks over, honouring my husband, loving my kids, serving in the church where needed, and watching to see the Lord make me, and those in my sphere of influence, more like Him. By His strength and for His glory. There is a way to serve at home with the same passion and commitment I would need if I were at the "end of the spear", so to speak. My prayer is that I would approach this Home Mission Field with just that zeal.
This is my marathon.
If you asked me to clarify what I was learning in that massive topic of death to self, I would say that I am learning to do only what the Lord is calling me to, and nothing else. This looks like me with my nose in my journal making lists of the roles I know for certain that I am called to fill, and then making lists with question marks beside for the roles I could fill, but maybe am not really required to fill. For example: I'm married, so I'm clearly supposed to be a wife. I have kids, therefore, I'm called to be a mom. And so on. But then it gets hazy. I sing at church. Does that mean for certain that I'm to be a worship leader? Or I write. Does that mean for certain that I'm to be a writer?
And then the complicating factor to all this is that I want to really serve the Lord. You know, the missionary comes to church and your heart is quickened by the crazy-faith they are asked to live out. Or that guy at church starts some wild outreach that terrifies, yet excites, you and all you want to do is find something "Big For God" to do. And truthfully, being a "writer" seems bigger and more impressive somedays than being "chief dish and bottle washer".
Yes, well, having 7 children and homeschooling them is a big job to be sure. And I have been convinced for some time that the Lord builds his Kingdom through families as much as through overseas missions, for example. There are many ways to build the Kingdom and I am honoured to serve Him in this way.
But sometimes that little "Look at me! I want to be important too!" attitude rears its ugly head and I question the value of the mundane tasks of my role. And the questioning doesn't squelch my doing the mundane, but certainly the enthusiasm with which I do it.
I want to be Peter walking on water! I want to be Stephen stoned for his faith (well, a little less of that, actually). Then I read this:
"Discipleship is built entirely on the supernatural grace of God. Walking on water is easy to someone with impulsive boldness, but walking on dry land as a disciple of Jesus Christ is something altogether different. Peter walked on water to go to Jesus, but he "followed Him at a distance" on dry land (Mark 14:54). We do not need the grace of God to withstand crises -- human nature and pride are sufficient for us to face the stress and strain magnificently. But it does require the supernatural grace of God to live twenty-four hours of every day as a saint, going through the drudgery, and living an ordinary, unnoticed, and ignored existence as a disciple of Jesus. It is ingrained in us that we have to do exceptional things for God -- but we do not. We have to be exceptional in the ordinary things of life, and holy on the ordinary streets, among ordinary people -- and this is not learned in five minutes." (Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest, October 21)
This is confirmation to me that it is the slow-plodding and small beginnings of being faithful in little before you are trusted with much that builds the Kingdom. And what do I want? A big one time blast of "super-holy-change-the-world" faith? Or a life time of faithful, useful, life-changing (mine and others) faith? Clearly the latter.
And so I continue, changing diapers, making meals, inviting folks over, honouring my husband, loving my kids, serving in the church where needed, and watching to see the Lord make me, and those in my sphere of influence, more like Him. By His strength and for His glory. There is a way to serve at home with the same passion and commitment I would need if I were at the "end of the spear", so to speak. My prayer is that I would approach this Home Mission Field with just that zeal.
This is my marathon.
Friday, September 25, 2009
Irrational Fears 101
Let me tell you, if the Lord handed out extra jewels for our eternal crowns based on number of and sheer irrationality of one’s, well, irrational fears, my crown would be so sparkly and bejeweled that you would need to wear sunglasses to look upon me, and so heavy that I would need a brace to support my neck in order for me to lift my head.
Allow me to list a few of my irrational fears to prove that, in this area of life at the least, I excel.
I am afraid that...
Please read the rest of my latest article for Heart of the Matter Online here.
Allow me to list a few of my irrational fears to prove that, in this area of life at the least, I excel.
I am afraid that...
Please read the rest of my latest article for Heart of the Matter Online here.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Wow-ful Women Wednesdays
Okay. So I really wanted there to be a real video for this song. However, you will need to be okay with the lyrics on a page. The other option was a photo of Natalie Grant. At least this has movement of some kind.
I was in the car and this came on the radio. I love the picture of being changed by simply being in the presence of a perfect God. He doesn't say "Come as you are and stay in the same miserable state". He says "Come as you are and I will make you like Me."
Yes Please. That's what I want.
I was in the car and this came on the radio. I love the picture of being changed by simply being in the presence of a perfect God. He doesn't say "Come as you are and stay in the same miserable state". He says "Come as you are and I will make you like Me."
Yes Please. That's what I want.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
True Love
What a song of rejoicing! What a song of hope!
I am blessed and moved by this song each time I hear it. Especially this paired down version with the Body of Christ joining in with one voice to celebrate the one, True Love that Christ poured out for us.
Phil Wickham (an artist you should really go listen to a whole lot of) singing True Love.
Come close listen to the story
About a love more faithful than the morning
The Father gave His only Son just to save us
The earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt the Father's Broken Heart
Tears were filling Heaven's Eyes
The day that True Love died, the day that True Love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that True Love died, The day that True Love died
Search your heart you know you can't deny it
Come on, lose your life just so you can find it
The Father gave His only Son just to save us
The Earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt The Fathers broken heart
Tears were filling Heaven's Eyes
The day that True Love died, the day that True Love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that True Love died, The day that True Love died
Now, Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Oh, He is alive
He rose again
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that True Love died, The day that True Love died
Come close listen to the story
I am blessed and moved by this song each time I hear it. Especially this paired down version with the Body of Christ joining in with one voice to celebrate the one, True Love that Christ poured out for us.
Phil Wickham (an artist you should really go listen to a whole lot of) singing True Love.
Come close listen to the story
About a love more faithful than the morning
The Father gave His only Son just to save us
The earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt the Father's Broken Heart
Tears were filling Heaven's Eyes
The day that True Love died, the day that True Love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that True Love died, The day that True Love died
Search your heart you know you can't deny it
Come on, lose your life just so you can find it
The Father gave His only Son just to save us
The Earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt The Fathers broken heart
Tears were filling Heaven's Eyes
The day that True Love died, the day that True Love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that True Love died, The day that True Love died
Now, Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Jesus is alive
Oh, He is alive
He rose again
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that True Love died, The day that True Love died
Come close listen to the story
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Up
Who knew that Pixar could bring me to my knees in prayer and thanksgiving, speaking a Word of reminder and purpose and encouragement to my weary heart?
We took the kids to see "Up" on Canada Day. Yes, that's right. All 7. I'm sure the folks near by wondered if they would survive the film when we walked in, or if they'd be able to hear anything over the noise of our raucous bunch. Little do they know that when you don't give your kids a whole lot of Tube Time, when you do sit them in front of something, they sit. And listen.
Except of course for the 6 year old who at one point nearly screamed "I'm scared because this is scary!" That was a bit distracting.
Regardless, despite my friend Bethany saying that she welled up with tears in "Up", I came unprepared. I, too, found myself with lump in throat within minutes of the opening scenes. And several times in the middle too.
I did mention this is by Pixar, right? Animation? Yup. Real tear-jerky. Or at least, you wouldn't expect it to be. But they told a story. A real, moral tale. Quite lovely.
Without wrecking the whole movie for those of you who have yet to see it, let me just say this: it is a movie about following dreams and pursuing adventure.
Now hear me: I am not one to say "follow your heart" or "be true to yourself" or "listen to your feelings" because I know the heart is deceitful above all else (Jer.17) and have found that to be true in many cases in my life, as I have followed after what "felt right" and been nearly irreversibly damaged by it.
Still, we all will agree that at times there burns in our soul a dream or a desire to do something of import. Something memorable. Something that will make a difference.
We know, when we are being reasonable, that we cannot all be gold medal olympians. We cannot all be Nobel Prize winning scientists. We cannot all be Billy Graham. And yet we want our lives to count for something.
Here is what I walked away with from "Up" on that note: sometimes our 'dreams' get absolutely in the way of the most important thing that we have been called to do. Our perceptions of what makes a life count are often wrapped up in all the wrong things. Things that are not of lasting worth. Things that are not truly beneficial after all.
Here is what great landscape the Lord has for me to conquer: 7 children whose hearts are malliable and still humble enough to learn from my husband and I. Will I waste this time chasing some other "big dream" or will I take this most precious, generation, world changing opportunity while it is right in front of me?
And with that comes a mountain to scale: my own selfishness as I seek my own desire and comfort above the joy of serving others by doing the menial tasks of my day. Does laundry and meal making seem like grand Kingdom work? No? Then my heart is in the wrong place and my attitude is one of despising the "least of these".
I want to carefully seek out what tasks the Lord has for me. I may never be a name that generations remember outside of my own family photo albums. I may never be someone noted in history books for making a difference. But I can, today, make a difference in the lives of 7 children and one wonderful husband, and in whatever opportunities to serve in my church and community may come up.
Lord, I pray that you would make me faithful in the little things before I expect to be used in the "great" things, knowing that the little things often are the great things in your eyes. And help me to remember that these busy years of parenting will vanish far quicker than I know, and then I will have years of "retirement" to work for You and to serve Your kingdom in ways I am unable now.
I wish I could find a video to go with this, but for now I hope these lyrics speak to you about what I am fumbling to express.
Kingdom Comes
by Sara Groves
When anger fills your heart
When in your pain and hurt
You find the strength to stop
You bless instead of curse
When doubting floods your soul
Though all things feel unjust
You open up your heart
You find a way to trust
That's a little stone that's a little mortar
That's a little seed that's a little water
In the hearts of the sons and the daughters
The kingdom's coming
When fear engulfs your mind
Says you protect your own
You still extend your hand
You open up your home
When sorrow fills your life
When in your grief and pain
You choose again to rise
You choose to bless the name
That's a little stone that's a little mortar
That's a little seed that's a little water
In the hearts of the sons and the daughters
The kingdom's coming
In the mundane tasks of living
In the pouring out and giving
In the waking up and trying
In the laying down and dying
That's a little stone that's a little mortar
That's a little seed that's a little water
In the hearts of the sons and the daughters
The kingdom's coming
We took the kids to see "Up" on Canada Day. Yes, that's right. All 7. I'm sure the folks near by wondered if they would survive the film when we walked in, or if they'd be able to hear anything over the noise of our raucous bunch. Little do they know that when you don't give your kids a whole lot of Tube Time, when you do sit them in front of something, they sit. And listen.
Except of course for the 6 year old who at one point nearly screamed "I'm scared because this is scary!" That was a bit distracting.
Regardless, despite my friend Bethany saying that she welled up with tears in "Up", I came unprepared. I, too, found myself with lump in throat within minutes of the opening scenes. And several times in the middle too.
I did mention this is by Pixar, right? Animation? Yup. Real tear-jerky. Or at least, you wouldn't expect it to be. But they told a story. A real, moral tale. Quite lovely.
Without wrecking the whole movie for those of you who have yet to see it, let me just say this: it is a movie about following dreams and pursuing adventure.
Now hear me: I am not one to say "follow your heart" or "be true to yourself" or "listen to your feelings" because I know the heart is deceitful above all else (Jer.17) and have found that to be true in many cases in my life, as I have followed after what "felt right" and been nearly irreversibly damaged by it.
Still, we all will agree that at times there burns in our soul a dream or a desire to do something of import. Something memorable. Something that will make a difference.
We know, when we are being reasonable, that we cannot all be gold medal olympians. We cannot all be Nobel Prize winning scientists. We cannot all be Billy Graham. And yet we want our lives to count for something.
Here is what I walked away with from "Up" on that note: sometimes our 'dreams' get absolutely in the way of the most important thing that we have been called to do. Our perceptions of what makes a life count are often wrapped up in all the wrong things. Things that are not of lasting worth. Things that are not truly beneficial after all.
Here is what great landscape the Lord has for me to conquer: 7 children whose hearts are malliable and still humble enough to learn from my husband and I. Will I waste this time chasing some other "big dream" or will I take this most precious, generation, world changing opportunity while it is right in front of me?
And with that comes a mountain to scale: my own selfishness as I seek my own desire and comfort above the joy of serving others by doing the menial tasks of my day. Does laundry and meal making seem like grand Kingdom work? No? Then my heart is in the wrong place and my attitude is one of despising the "least of these".
I want to carefully seek out what tasks the Lord has for me. I may never be a name that generations remember outside of my own family photo albums. I may never be someone noted in history books for making a difference. But I can, today, make a difference in the lives of 7 children and one wonderful husband, and in whatever opportunities to serve in my church and community may come up.
Lord, I pray that you would make me faithful in the little things before I expect to be used in the "great" things, knowing that the little things often are the great things in your eyes. And help me to remember that these busy years of parenting will vanish far quicker than I know, and then I will have years of "retirement" to work for You and to serve Your kingdom in ways I am unable now.
I wish I could find a video to go with this, but for now I hope these lyrics speak to you about what I am fumbling to express.
Kingdom Comes
by Sara Groves
When anger fills your heart
When in your pain and hurt
You find the strength to stop
You bless instead of curse
When doubting floods your soul
Though all things feel unjust
You open up your heart
You find a way to trust
That's a little stone that's a little mortar
That's a little seed that's a little water
In the hearts of the sons and the daughters
The kingdom's coming
When fear engulfs your mind
Says you protect your own
You still extend your hand
You open up your home
When sorrow fills your life
When in your grief and pain
You choose again to rise
You choose to bless the name
That's a little stone that's a little mortar
That's a little seed that's a little water
In the hearts of the sons and the daughters
The kingdom's coming
In the mundane tasks of living
In the pouring out and giving
In the waking up and trying
In the laying down and dying
That's a little stone that's a little mortar
That's a little seed that's a little water
In the hearts of the sons and the daughters
The kingdom's coming
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Wow-ful Women Wednesdays
Happy Dominion Day! Let's celebrate some Wow-ful Canadian Women today shall we?
Let's start off patriotic and emotional and overwhelmed with happy happy. Gotta love a Gold Medal Olympic Moment.
And this Wow-ful woman is highlighting her wow-ful man. Do you remember this from CBC TV commercials? Seriously, instantly takes me back to my days in Selkirk, Manitoba.
But on a more "Dominion" note, I will end here. This is my prayer for our cities, and our nation. Happy Canada Day! (I know they aren't Canadian, but Commonwealth counts, right?)
Let's start off patriotic and emotional and overwhelmed with happy happy. Gotta love a Gold Medal Olympic Moment.
And this Wow-ful woman is highlighting her wow-ful man. Do you remember this from CBC TV commercials? Seriously, instantly takes me back to my days in Selkirk, Manitoba.
But on a more "Dominion" note, I will end here. This is my prayer for our cities, and our nation. Happy Canada Day! (I know they aren't Canadian, but Commonwealth counts, right?)
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