My husband keeps our books and manages our finances. I love that guy. He has a great analytical, planning mind and it helps us to keep on track and stay on budget. I cannot tell you how helpful that is and how grateful I am to have that kind of structure in our home.
Now, to be sure, he keeps me “in the loop” and takes my input into account with the budgeting: how much do we need for groceries? How much for diapers? How much for curriculum and extra-curricular activities? We discuss our plans and goals for the year and make decisions accordingly. All in all, it is a great system.
And really, the hardest thing he asks me to do is to give him all of my receipts for anything I didn’t spend cash for. Easy breezy, right?
See, sometimes I’m very good at putting them on his desk right away. Come home from store: take receipt out of purse: place on desk. Three simple steps. And really, most of my buying is done with cash anyway so the receipts shouldn’t add up in my wallet at all. However, being human, sometimes they do congregate in my purse, and seemingly multiply, until I have a several of them making a crinkly, noisy stash which adds up to a whole lot of anxiety on my part.
Now if you have spent any time reading my blog, you may have discovered that I have an over-active guilt gland. I can feel guilty about things I’ve done, things I might do, things you think I might have done, and really, on a good day, even about things *you’ve* done. I’m a guilt over-achiever. So as the receipts pile up in my wallet, I start to carry a heavy, self-imposed load of guilt. The longer I wait to finally get them out of my purse, the harder it is to do, and then the more receipts there are, and then the harder it is to do, so the longer I wait, and then the more receipts there are, and the harder it is… What a cycle!
Something else needs to be said here before I continue. The receipts in my wallet are not for crazy things. They are not representing some wild shopping spree at a shoe store, or book store, or fast food restaurant. They are not the proof of frivolous spending. They will show that I have purchased gas, groceries, shampoo, a gift for the birthday girl: all things that are budgeted and accounted for.
Also of note, is the fact that my husband has never made a big deal about this. He is not a grumpy guy who is waiting to make me feel bad for being slow in getting him the receipts. I’m not feeling guilty because I know he is going to be angry. He never is.
The guilt comes from .....
Please read the rest of my latest Heart of The Matter Article here.